Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Big Mail Day

Today I got a couple things in the mail. They were both exciting in their own way.

First, I got a birthday card. This does not seem that special, as it was my birthday today. But what makes it special is the fact that it was from a woman from the blogworld. Patricia to be exact. How awesome is she? So awesome. I have been so surprised by the gifts and cards and flowers that have arrived at my house for my birthday (although, ahem, Patricia was the only one that got it here on the ACTUAL birthday, whereas the boys just kinda aimed for an approximate date. (But then again, any time anyone wants to send me chocolate and flowers, you can aim for pretty much anything you want and I’ll gladly accept (Do make a note of that)))

Here is Patricia’s card:


How much do I love that someone I’ve never met got me a card hailing the wonders of cake?! Anyone who has met me in real life knows that I enjoy cake. Probably a little too much.

So thank you sweet Patricia, dontcha love how a little card can just make someone smile? It’s so friggin’ Hallmark Commercial I may vomit. But I’ll be smiling the whole time.

And then.

I got a check.

Now, see, again, any time anyone wants to send me money in the mail, just go for it. Don’t even ask my permission, I promise I’ll be supportive of your efforts. But here’s the thing. And I hate to be negative, cause I’m usually so peppy. But the thing is I got a check from the Card Company who uses a couple of my quotes on a couple of their cards. I know that it’s not exactly kosher to talk about money and stuff, but besides the ChrisKwanziKah Cap, I very rarely do anything kosher.

The problem with the Card Company is that they include a little spreadsheet explaining the amount of money they are sending you. This is where they are misguided. I know that they should send an explanation of the check along with the check, but really, I’d be fine with just a check. So, I open my envelope and I see a check. And I’m like, “Woot woot, I got money, that’s fun.” And then I look at the spreadsheet:

This is a small part of the spreadsheet. This is the part that indicates how much money this Card Company made off of my words.

And then here is my check:

See, now, getting this check in the mail, when you only get it once a year and so therefore pretty much forget about it, and therefore it’s a surprise when you get it - FREE MONEY! - it’s pretty fun. But this fun is killed in knowing that your little words made 43 grand last year, and you only get $860.

I bet my words are living it up though. I hope they are having fun out there in New York, those crazy words.

But on the whole, who can complain about a nice birthday card and free money for your birthday? Add in the cake my mom made me and the fried potatoes my dad cooked for me (It’s my birthday, I’ll fry if I want to) and overall, it was a pretty good day.

Oh and by the way, today marks the beginning of my last year in my 20's. Once I’m out of my 20's I can’t act like an irresponsible fool, because it ain’t cute anymore. Therefore, this year is going to be quite interesting, as I get all my foolery out of my system. It might make for some interesting blogs, if nothing else....

3 comments:

tornwordo said...

Happy birthday! Many women choose to never advance their age at this stage. I know a fifty year old woman who still claims she's 29. Not so cute anymore.

Chunks said...

You are a borderline celebrity! What with your saving the world, writing greeting cards and walking to the moon and all.

I feel joy in "knowing" you.

(And if I'd have known Patricia had your address, I would have scoffed it off her and sent you something! Who knows, maybe I will!)

Patricia said...

well dang if my little greeting didn't make the news. i'm glad it got there on time!

in other news, i think it is the exact opposite of a hallmark moment for the company to send you a spreadsheet indicating the 98% profit they are keeping from your words.

and now, yes, every single card i look at in the store, i will read with it potentially being your words. i wonder if my local gold crown store will mind me setting up a cot. it's gonna take me a while to read all those cards.

it's rude and all, but dang, how cool to get such a check!! that oughta buy a few pairs of walking shoes.