“Hey Dawn, it’s me, I got your message, and now I guess we are playing phone tag. We just got in from Belize this morning at 2 a.m., I had a great birthday while we were there. But when we got back I found out the dog has fleas, so I have to deal with that. Call me when you get the chance, bye.”
Oh, and that birthday she was referring to? That would be her 10th birthday. Uh, what 10 year old plays phone tag? And what 10 year old flies in from Belize at 2 a.m.?
The same 10 year old who thinks she can “fit me in” on Sunday. What a peach.
Despite the fact that she obviously has a social calendar that rivals J Lo it is hard to believe that the kid is already 10 years old. Where the hell did that decade go? And thank god I didn’t age at all during that passing time. That would have been horrible.
But I gotta say, I like that she’s getting older. Who has any use for young kids? Sure they’re cute and all, but their conversation skills are horrendous and they very rarely understand good sarcasm. Babies are even worse. They just lay there. And poop. And they only laugh at peek-a-boo. So boring.
But you have to hang out with the babies, and then keep hanging out with them when they start to get older. Because if you only hang out with them once they are old enough to be fun then you have missed valuable influencing time. And if you don’t start influencing when they are young then there is a good chance they’ll never understand good sarcasm. And that’s how boring adults are made.
If you are able to play a key role in the life of a child as she grows up you will be blessed with many beautiful moments. There will be learning how to ride the bike, or losing teeth or maybe even 483 recitals, each off-key, disorganized one of them a priceless piece of my heart.
Or maybe you’ll be walking down the street one day with the child and a block away someone will yell, “Marco!” to an unknown person. And you will look at the child and without saying a word you will both yell at the top of your lungs, “POLO!” And the two of you will laugh. And other people on the street will stare at you with confused looks as you continue your out of water Marco Polo game. And you will say to them, “Ten years is a small investment in creating a little human being that gets my sense of humor.”