Saturday, July 23, 2005

Scary Ad

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So I'm waiting in a waiting room today. (As that's what you do in a waiting room usually.) And I'm flipping through a magazine and I see this ad. It's for a dishwasher. A really quiet dishwasher. You know it's quiet cause the baby is sleeping while it's on. Or something.

I have two problems with this ad:

1) Babies sleeping through something doesn't exactly make it quiet. I held my friend's sleeping baby the other night at a wedding reception while he and his girlfriend danced. To blaring music. From the 70's. And this baby didn't even think about waking up. (She did wake up to She Shook Me All Night Long though, cause every human being is born with the instinct to dance to that song.)

2) Why the hell is the baby sleeping on the COUNTER unattended?!! Is a noisy dishwasher the ONLY reason people weren't letting their babies nap on the counter?

At least the parents were smart enough to put a nice little blanket down for the kid.

Oh, and if you're thinking that maybe the baby is laying on the floor instead of the counter I have two problems with that as well:

1) Who puts a kid down for a nap on the kitchen floor? With a knife on the counter above them? (cutting the oranges)

2) AND if this baby is laying on the floor then this baby is a giant baby and is actually the size of the dishwasher. In which case his parents need to get his baby butt down to the Maury Povich Show ASAP. We all know Maury loves him some giant babies.


Anonymous said...

I don't know what you're talking about. After seeing this ad I went online and bought a bosch dishwasher. I already have a perfectly fine diswasher, but this ad told me if I had a bosch it'd be like having a cute baby. And chicks dig cute babies. Especially when they are cute and asleep instead of awake and crying and/or soiling themself. And all this child safety stuff, sleeping on a counter, under a knife... Maybe I'm alone on this one, but this "stop the world for child safety" goes too far. I want to go back to a time when kids had 8 or 9 siblings, if one of them died that meant they now had 7 or 8.

Anonymous said...

What the ad is trying to translate is that the baby is DREAMING of a perfectly quiet dishwasher so he CAN sleep. The kitchen is merely part of his miniscule "baby-dream". The wee one is not dreaming of the next meal from mom's teat, or a dangly mobile of shapes hovering above its crib, but merely QUIET.

If babies can dream about quiet dishwashers, than perhaps their parents will get the message that the one they have now is too damn loud and buy a new one. Hence, the ad. How did you NOT get that?

dawn said...

I see that I have obviously missed the entire point of this ad. I will go online now and order a dishwasher to make up for my stupidity.

Hieronymous Bosch said...

I'm sorry, but you can only order a dishwasher if you have a baby.

dawn said...

does it have to be a giant baby?

Hieronymous Bosch said...

No, just a baby that likes to sleep in the kitchen on a red towel.